Blog
Below you will find all the blogs and news from Collaborative Counselling.
Release Expectations and Never Be Disappointed Again
Want to have less frustration and perform better, then rethink expectations. I will explain why and how…
Disappointment, one of the hardest emotions to deal with, for all ages. But there is a way to avoid this uncomfortable, often upsetting feeling. Disappointment is the negative emotion experienced when an outcome does not match up to an expectation. So, why not let go of expectations in order to avoid disappointment? I guarantee that if you can learn to let go of expectations then you will be far less disappointed.
Take Nothing Personally Nothing Others Do is Because of You
If I could give everyone in the world one piece of advice it would be to never, ever take anything personally. No matter what anyone says or does I can guarantee it is never about you. You will always come across people who say or do things that are negative, impolite, disappointing, insulting or offensive. But just because they are projecting this negative energy onto you it does not mean you need to absorb it. You can simply say to yourself ‘No, thank you’, stay in your higher, positive place and instead try to understand what is going on with them so that you do not make it about you…
Dealing With Conflict
Often when we find ourselves in a conflict we can become defensive and defiant, or even dismissive, holding fast to our convictions. We try to convince others of the validity of our beliefs or try to force others to our way of thinking. But by doing this we are missing out on an opportunity to learn. If we instead choose to stop and listen we can learn something new, whether it be about another’s feelings or beliefs, opinions or experience.
Controlling Negative Emotions
Negative emotions are part of life. Feelings such as sadness, anxiety, anger or guilt can and will present themselves, for some more often than others. As painful as they can be, these emotions do not set out to intentionally make you suffer, this is simply your body’s way of trying to protect you, to tell you something needs to be addressed. Imagine your emotions are like an alarm system fitted around a house. When something is not right the alarm system trips to get your attention. Sometimes there is something serious that needs addressing, other times it is just the neighbour’s cat running across the garden.
New Year, Amazing You!
New year, new you, right? OK, but what about the old you? Have you taken a moment to think about the great things you do every day and how wonderful you are? That little voice will probably kick in at this point, your inner critic telling you that this post must be aimed at someone else, but it is not, it is aimed at you. Wonderful, marvellous you! Why?
Dealing with Mistakes & Failure: the OMG Approach
Own it, Move on from it, Grow from it
We all make mistakes, it is part of being human and essential to our growth. Whether at work/school or within our personal lives we sometimes stumble and get things wrong. And that is fine. So why whenever we fail at something do we feel disappointment or even shame? Why do we react defensively, desperate to deny any responsibility?
Back to School Blues
Don’t worry, instead prepare. As the end of the summer holidays draws ever nearer many students (and teachers!) will be feeling a mixture of excitement and anxiety. Whether starting a new year group or a new school entirely it’s normal to feel apprehensive about new things.
How to Deal with Negative People
Why do we value the opinion of others over our own? No-one understands your values and what is in your heart more than you and yet a negative opinion can fill you full of self doubt and question your very being.
Trying to Fix a Damaged Relationship?
Give Choice Theory a Go…
William Glasser, the world-renowned psychiatrist and founder of Reality Therapy and Choice Theory concluded that most mental health issues stem from a relationship no longer going well.
How to Alleviate your Stress and Anxiety
A certain amount of stress and anxiety is normal. It kept early man alive and now it drives us to prepare and perform. All animals and humans are designed to live in an immediate return environment.
Sugar: Addictive, Toxic and Bad for your Mental Health
We now know so much more about how our environment, diet and lifestyle affects our health and mental well being, small changes in our daily lives can have a dramatic effect. Nutrition, for example, is an area that research is constantly proving can affect mental health. For example sugar.
Don’t Judge Others, Judge Yourself & You Will be Truly Happy
Those were the wise words from Mahatma Gandhi and he was not the only great leader trying to embed this value. Jesus Christ told us ‘He be without sin cast the first stone’ and Marcus Arelius cautioned ‘Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.’ No one likes to be judged and no one likes to be considered judgemental, so why do we do it and how do we stop?